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Just because I am stupid and I like it!

Christian Ney

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e-mail to Asus:


Dear Mr. xxxx,


I regret to annonce you that unfortunately I may not be able to return the samples of latest Asus ROG laptop you just send me in - let's say - working conditions.


As you may know (I guess I informed you before you sent me the sample so you were aware of that) that we at Ocaholic were from now on going to do crash tests on laptops.


And you know... My office is in a building, a big building (12 stairs). Things happen, it's life you know, the windows was open...


Anyway for the crash test we drop it from the top of the building to the ground and unfortunately for the first test/run I forgot to record the time (from t0 (top of the building) to tx (ground)).



So I had to bench it one more time. Unfotunately something else happened and the laptop did hit a recylcle bin. Which is not the ground so it has altered the testing conditions. And at Ocaholic we have very strict testing conditions and everything has to be 100 % perfect, that's why we did the test a third time.


(editor's note: Damn this elevator is soo slow).


Anyway everything went perfect during the third test. Fortunately because we ran out of samples as you sent us only 3 samples.



But my point is if you are able to send us a new sample. Because you may know that I have a lot of work and I am busy all day long so sometimes I miss something. And I forgot to test it before doing crash testing.


After what happened I will understand that you may not want to send us a new sample anyway it's free to ask. So can you please kindly provide us with a new sample so we can continue our testing.


PS: btw all three sampls failed the crash test.

PS2: Some screws may be missing.


Kind Regards

Christian Ney

Ocaholic Editorial

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You should also be thorough and do splash tests to see if they are water resistant, maybe a quick drop in a pool. As well as EMI tests where you MRI the laptop. You should also consider Ln2 testing where you submerge the laptop in a bucket of LN2 and then bring it out and let it rest for 30minutes and test it to see if it functions.

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Christian Ney's 4 steps of 48732347.jpg review procedure


1. Always deliver hardware to him via Personal Express




2. ALWAYS deliver Mainboards in right position or he might RMA it due to not finding socket and RAM-slots on the first look (crash test included).




3. Be aware you will get back the samples broken ^^




4. Chances of a bad day after recieving back your sample(s) are high - so make sure to have an umbrella with you that day :D



Edited by SoF
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Christian N. : Morning Marc
rewarder : morning
Christian N. : Can I disassembly it ?
rewarder : yes sure
Christian N. : Okay going downstairs then cu later
rewarder : wait why ?
rewarder : What are you going to disassembly ?
rewarder : I thought you were talking about the test system
rewarder : Oh my god ...
rewarder is now offline



He didn't manage to arrive at the office in time.


@ Asus, for my defense my boss said yes to do so.

PS: can you please send me the manual to assembly it back ?



Edited by Christian Ney
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Did it include a "Christian, you're fired" too ? :P


Nono :) I'm stupid but not that stupid :D


This was the actual conversation :D


[11:06:22] Christian Ney: green light to disassembly it ?

[11:06:26] Christian Ney: (devil)

[11:06:39] ocarewarder: ?

[11:07:47] Christian Ney: the laptop

[11:07:48] Christian Ney: :P

[11:07:53] ocarewarder: ah

[11:08:04] ocarewarder: yeah.

[11:08:07] Christian Ney: sweet

[11:08:08] Christian Ney: brb

[11:08:14] Christian Ney: take screwdrivers and hammer

[11:08:16] ocarewarder: don't forget to take pics ;)

[11:08:31] ocarewarder: no window? boring ... :(

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